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Millennial Houseplant
Millennial Houseplant

Hi, I’m Crystal.

I am an artist – consider myself to be a creative person (not just because my imposter syndrome would never tolerate calling myself an artist) as I love to write, paint, graphic design, and craft. I’m a middle-aged mom (according to at least one person on the internet) and if you couldn’t tell already by the title of this site or the overuse of parentheticals, I am a millennial. I made my first website in 1998 and haven’t really stopped since. When I’m not working a customary 40 hours to support my livelihood I am writing and publishing romance and romantasy on Amazon/Kindle Unlimited and using my social media to bring awareness to the social and political causes I care most deeply about. If you like what you see or read here then I thank you for your time!

Been a while since you’ve been here? Find out what’s new on the Updates page (or go to Home > Updates). 

  • This one time in 7th grade

    02/16/2026

    I forget why but this one time in 7th grade I got in trouble in PE class and as punishment I had to copy the text from a sheet of paper by typing into a computer

    Read the rest…

  • RIP James Van Der Beek

    02/11/2026

    Like many millennials, I spent a good chunk of my adolescence watching The WB (known today as The CW), and that of course included watching every season of Dawson’s Creek. So naturally it came as a

    Read the rest…

  • Zoe Thanatos Trailer…. from the archives

    02/07/2026

    Back when I first began my journey with self publishing, one of the marketing projects I created was a book trailer for my debut novel, Zoe Thanatos. Well I found it on my eternal hard drive

    Read the rest…

  • Me My Mom My Grandma

    01/21/2026

    Out of sheer curiosity I decided to create a spreadsheet that would automatically calculate for me the age of both my mom and grandma (aka my parents) at every year of my life so far, alongside

    Read the rest…

  • Opus One On Loop

    01/16/2026

    iykyk…

    Read the rest…

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@hi_crystalp

New in the Bookshop

  • Observing Rielle by Crystal Cierlak Observing Rielle by Crystal Cierlak $2.99 Original price was: $2.99.$1.99Current price is: $1.99.
  • Awakening Rielle by Crystal Cierlak Awakening Rielle by Crystal Cierlak $2.99 Original price was: $2.99.$1.99Current price is: $1.99.
  • Convince Me to Stay by Lauren Bolt Convince Me to Stay by Lauren Bolt $1.00

The Latest

  • This one time in 7th grade
  • RIP James Van Der Beek
  • Zoe Thanatos Trailer…. from the archives
  • Me My Mom My Grandma
  • Opus One On Loop
February 2026
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Crystal Cierlak
Lauren Bolt

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  • Home
    • All Blog Posts
    • Updates
  • Info
    • About the Author
      • Crystal Cierlak
      • Lauren Bolt
    • Academic Writing
      • Guerrilla Girls: Giving a Voice To the Muted
      • Graduate Thesis
    • AI Disclosure
    • Book Deals
    • Catalogue
    • Currently Reading
    • Free Book Please
  • Lore
  • Playlists
  • Photo Album
  • Bookshop
    • My account
    • Cart
    • FAQ
    • Report A Typo